May 19, 2009

#59 feedback / haven't seen her since

her first piece was high-schoolish
self-absorbed ramble
we said
great voice
good variety of sentences

the next was decent
stumbling with moments of quality
we said
tight language
good visual images

the next was enjoyable
i was sad the ending disappeared
we said
excellent opening
real characters

the next was even more solid
confusing in parts
we said
confusing
...

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