May 30, 2009

#60 the white one / albino-sphere / that's my cue

booed every failure
never cheered
successes unnoticed 
blame without glory

involved in every game
every break
every shot
every set-up
every leave
a life behind the scenes

not high or low
or stripe or solid
none of the rep of the 8

May 19, 2009

#59 feedback / haven't seen her since

her first piece was high-schoolish
self-absorbed ramble
we said
great voice
good variety of sentences

the next was decent
stumbling with moments of quality
we said
tight language
good visual images

the next was enjoyable
i was sad the ending disappeared
we said
excellent opening
real characters

the next was even more solid
confusing in parts
we said
confusing
...

#58 looking around, looking back

tired furniture
dusty guitar
hair and grit

between sofa cushions
dead

a twelve year old's voice
disapproves from within

prime minister?
visionary?
philanthropist?

on a cushy salary
dead

May 16, 2009

#57 Bull Fighter

It is coming at me

Like a train

It is arriving soon

actually loudly thundering

it is coming at me

the rather large animal

Today I will but defeat it

I charge at the red

He waves a red blanket

At the bull


Your bull stampedes upon paper 

Empty cliches

Inactive verbs

Redundant adverbs

Passive voice

Flat characters, general words

Phony dialogue, confusing pronouns

Inconsistent POV

I wave my red pen

At your bull

-your editor

May 15, 2009

#56 a wish granted

dome cave
lonely paradise
rock walls
sand floor

BigStar's light 
travels over unnamed ocean 
up the beach
through igloo-like entrance

lifesize-plus statue
a forgotten culture
hand, bowl-shaped
holds sand and pebbles
each pebble a wish
for the millenium's soul-searching traveller

a tremor
trembles the 30-foot world
sand and pebbles rain to the floor

stillness


May 12, 2009

#54 disposable rant

america's lost
not the war
itself
lost itself
among satellitesitcomsandstyrofoamandfoilwrappersdisposablecupsdisposableeverything
disposable everything
even disposable income
what do Depression survivors think of that term
disposable income?
lost itself among stuff
stuff

does it have the stuff to find itself?
does it have the stuff to point the finger at itself?
is there room for humility
for humble apologies?
apologies to the backs we've broken on this free ride
to the child-slave-laborists
to the people
to the countries

#53 Cash and fame

freight car 
from his soul
building
below booze
Building
below pollution
BUILDING
so lonesome he could cry
and beside dylan
lonely pianist
lonely souls
lonely in fame
lonely in search
lonely in song
famous in life
famous in death
lonesome in both


#52 educational convenience

26 faces gaze
empty-eyed
sick from force-fed knowledge

society fills their time
8 'til 3
under official cloak
Curriculum Outcomes Objectives
while parents drone
through well-paying
unrewarding jobs

the bigger Littles question the worshipping, the False Gods
MarkBooks, ReportCards, Because-I-Said-So's
revolt with rolled eyes
and apathetic posture

a bell rings
small rectangle tributaries
spill into the Hallway confluence

herded by the Tall-Ones
Littles empty into the biggest rectanglest room
to eat
while a few Tall-Ones shout orders

no room
for elbows or individuality





May 11, 2009

#51 lost loves, found laundry

i lost a shirt once
a good shirt
a great shirt
one of my favourites
my favourite

the bad of us
is interring with the bones

i remeber your smile
your laugh
your meals

i forget
what i forget:

argumentstemperandangrywords

i remember
the library
the watermelon game
late night phone calls


i compare
the reality of now
the fairy tale of then

today's real struggle
yesterday's imagined bliss

the shirt?
found.


faded
stained
thin


Ugly

May 4, 2009

#50 marathon training

run 
run 
run 
run 
run
rest... 

repeat

May 3, 2009

#49 the kid behind the counter

to go..? 
or
are you staying?

hmph
i wish i knew

to stay
safe 
easy
default

to go
risk
unknown
adjustment

goddamn
pimple-nose
minimum-wage-makin burger-flipper